Why Do Emotions Feel So Intense?

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Hey Reader,

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The punch was caught on camera.

On October 21st during a high school basketball game, a coach and referee got into a verbal altercation. This is not an uncommon scenario, except that this situation escalated quickly. The referee punched the coach without warning and threw a couple more strikes too.

The referee has since posted bail of $65,000 and was charged with battery.

Our emotions can get intense.

Real intense.

It makes you wonder why emotions can be so painful?

We all feel painful emotions

Emotions are hard-wired into our biology.

But the intensity of the emotions varies. It’s like a rollercoaster ride. The highs and lows can be very intense, but the overall experience is relatively brief.

When we experience emotions, cortisol, serotonin, and endorphins get involved because the brain and emotions are linked.

And each of these chemicals plays a critical role in coping with stress and fatigue.

Let's imagine that you are the referee of that high school basketball game and the gym is packed. Fans are on your case for not calling a foul and one of the coaches barks in your ear every time down the floor. Your cortisol levels go through the roof to help you respond to the stress.But then this happens at the next game and the one after that too. What happens to you when this pressure continues?

Your sensitivity to similar situations can cause attention and impulsivity problems.

Resulting in something you regret.

Neglecting healthy habits can increase your reactivity and susceptibility to emotional overwhelm

It doesn’t matter if you’re the reincarnated Marcus Aurelius, there will be times when you’re challenged.

Fatigue and hunger can make you angry and irritable. Even if you’re an experienced meditator or a well-practiced stoic, vulnerabilities such as these impact your ability to regulate your emotions. As a result, awareness is crucial.

Identify all the factors that apply to you, and add any that don't appear:

• Lack of sleep
• Poor diet (too much junk food)
• Dehydration
• Too much caffeine
• Hunger
• Over-eating and under-eating
• Injuries
• Illness
• Financial problems
• Unemployment
• Overworking
• Recent trauma (losses or accidents)
• Relationship difficulties
• Victim of a crime
• Lack of exercise
• Fatigue
• Recent personal failure
• Other(s):

Vulnerabilities such as these can negatively impact your thinking habits. So, increasing your awareness is the first step to making any significant change.

When you’re run down or reactive, you're unplugged

And when you’re unplugged, you’re less likely to think for yourself.

Remember the second dart? Having feelings about feelings? The referee could've felt fear about people getting on his case about the foul he called. However, this fear could give way to anger and lead one to believe that someone needs to be “taught a lesson.” This is where bad situations can be made worse.

Your automatic thoughts and judgments affect your experience of emotions.

Leaning into them cranks up the intensity dial.

Reader, look back at your list of factors from the previous section. Are you sleeping well, drinking enough water, or dealing with an illness?

Having a good or bad attitude is irrelevant here. These factors affect your emotions intensity.

And what you say to yourself matters because your thoughts can affect your emotional control.

Now that we have a general awareness of our emotions, it's time to dig deep. It's time to practice the art of being awake, a full participant in life, and become more intentional with our actions.

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P.S.

Please let me know what factor makes you more reactive/susceptible to emotional overwhelm by replying to this email. And if you think someone could benefit, please share!

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P.P.S

If you referee and need to blow off some steam, I would suggest whistle therapy. If this was shared with you, you can subscribe here: https://turningthemind.carrd.co/​

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See you next Saturday,

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Marcus (when will the puns end!?) W.

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113 Cherry St #92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2205
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